Archive for April, 2005

top ten signs you’re a fundamentalist christian

April 24, 2005

10 – You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 – You feel insulted and “dehumanized” when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 – You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Trinity.

7 – Your face turns purple when you hear of the “atrocities” attributed to Allah, but you don’t even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in “Exodus” and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in “Joshua” including women, children, and trees!

6 – You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 – You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 – You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs — though excluding those in all rival sects – will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most “tolerant” and “loving.”

3 – While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in “tongues” may be all the evidence you need to “prove” Christianity.

2 – You define 0.01% as a “high success rate” when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 – You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history – but still call yourself a Christian.

From here. Thanks to ryland at

lance krall show

April 24, 2005

Watched the first episode the other night. I don’t watch a whole lot of SpikeTV (or TV for that matter) but Lance is a “friend”. The quotes are there as I’ve never actually met him, but he’s a member of a VERY exclusive group that I, for some strangly wonderful reason, am also active in. Other members of the cast are also members of this group, which I could tell you about, but it would only make you jealous and possibly ruin your afternoon looking in vain for ways in (thanks AT).He likes his Star Wars and is talented. For those of you who don’t know his work, he played a flamboyantly gay character (was it “Kip”) in the first season of the very well done “reality” show, “Joe Schmo” (also on SpikeTV). Not a fan of reality TV, but this one with all actors except for “Joe” was hilarious.

Anyway, set your VCRs and pick up “The Lance Krall Show” on SpikeTV at 10:05 CST (11:05 for you East Coasters) on Monday nights.

For an insider’s look at the show click here.

bush, delay and frist can suck it (or “much more of this and i’m taking my family and getting the hell outta here.”)

April 22, 2005

This country is on a fast downward spiral. The framers had a good idea when they decided that the theocracies they escaped from wouldn’t be the model used here. Over the past few years and even more dramatically in the past 12 months, we’ve gotten to the point that if you aren’t a fundamental Christian, you’re against the U.S. These assholes like Bush, DeLay, and Frist are ruining the things that made this country great. We have economic and social issues that need a lot of work and these children are hosting a big dick (or at least Bible) swinging contest.And the goddamn hypocrisy — Minnesota has a budget deficit and our “Born-again” Christo-Republican Jackass of a Governor is spending all of his time talking about building casinos! W and his cronies are still behind the death penalty (how many retarded — and innocent folks have been given a lethal injection or strapped in to ol’ Sparky down in Texas?) in a time when the Republicans have all been handed the talking points on the “Culture of Life”. Listening to these guys, and yes apart from that Nazi hag Ann Coulter they’re all rich white dudes, is like hearing the same speech over an over. It really doesn’t even matter what they’re addressing. “Blah blah blah, we must protect the (insert white christian group here — children, woman in vegetative state, unborn — again white kids)! It’s a matter of faith. Our “Culture of Life” demands it. Blah blah blah… Something, something, (insert purposefully mispronounced foreign national leader name as a means of negating the importance of anyone unforturnate enough not to live in the “land of the free”)… blah blah blah “Nukular” blah blah blah.

Oh and don’t talk to me about Condoleez Rice being both black and woman. Strangely enough the name “Condoleeza” is slang in some long-dead Native American language for “Man of Sparks and Metal”. It’s a robot, built by, cleaned, and programmed nightly by a bunch of captive Russian scientists in a basement in the Pentagon. Seriously.

Every day it’s something else. Judicial appointments, bullying Supreme Court Justices for supporting laws that have been on the books for years (in some cases hundreds of years), the whole Terri Schiavo mess, dealing with the “Muslim problem”, pissing off the rest of the world and more. It’s one thing to be the superpower and an entirely different thing to be the school bully — another issue they’ve decided needs immediate legislative action. It’s all about religion now it seems in a time that we have so many other, actually relevant issues to deal with.

This used to be a great country. Not any longer.

got an idea for a project?

April 22, 2005

eMachineShop may be the answer to your financial independence. You don’t need a factory of employees any more. Use their software to draw up what you need and order 1 to 1,000,000 of your widgets in a number of materials.Ang has all kinds of ideas for products. Maybe it’s finally time to get crackin’.


April 20, 2005

Rotavirus (I always thought it was rotOvirus, but it isn’t) is running around our house right now. This has been the absolute worst string of illness our family has been through. It’s been 7 weeks of at least one (and now all) of the boys being sick. Rotavirus is a big one too. To summarize the past few days: A whole lot of puking, even more diarrhea (anyone else get a thrill when they spell a word like that correctly the first try?).Here’s the tally on the hell we’re in:
Sunday (day): Puking.
Sunday (midnight): Diarrhea all over the bathroom floor — this was a doozy.
Monday (morning): Two kids coated from head to toe in their own diarrhea.
Monday (day): Much more diarrhea, some puking.
Tuesday (morning): Two kids coated from head to toe in their own diarhhea.
Tuesday (day): We’re going through so many diapers, one kid puking.
Tuesday (10PM): So much diarrhea on the carpeting, I briefly consider burning the house down and starting from scratch.
Wednesday (6AM): One more covered from head to toe.
Thankfully Ang and I have so far avoided it with excessive compulsive levels of hand washing with good ol’ Ecolab Antimicrobial Soap (thanks mom!).