Archive for August, 2005

toss ‘er back on the burning plane

August 2, 2005

NOTE: This is a woman commenting on a fiery plane crash in which EVERY SINGLE PERSON survived.I appreciate the fact that this woman was likely in shock, but she sure seems like she knows what she was saying. What an ungrateful bitch.

(from an AP story)Gwen Dunlop, a Toronto resident who was on the flight returning from vacation in France, said when the plane first touched down the passengers believed they had landed safely and clapped with relief.

“Only seconds later, it started really moving and obviously it wasn’t OK,” said Dunlop. “At some point the wing was off. The oxygen masks never came down; the plane was filling up with smoke.”<– umm… dumbass? uh, you’re on the ground. This wasn’t a pressurization issue. WHAT THE HELL do you want the masks dropping for? To get tangled up in as you exit? Next time, you can sit on the plane with your mask while the rest of the passengers survive.

She said one of the flight attendants tried to calm passengers and tell them that everything was fine.<– Sounds like a damn good flight attendant, or “hostess” as you’ll call them in a moment

“One of the hostesses said, ‘You can calm down, it’s OK,’ and yet the plane was on fire and smoke was pouring in,” Dunlop told The AP. “I don’t like to criticize, but the staff did not seem helpful or prepared.” <– yeah, they should have been freaking out — that’s how they train them right?

Dunlop, who was ushered away from journalists by airport officials, said some passengers went down emergency chutes, while others jumped out on their own.<– I picture them dragging her away to a room full of the singed flight attendants

She said the pouring rain, lightning and thunder added to the drama. “We were just thrown into the weather.”<– Sounds like they should have tossed you back on the plane.

When I’m in the need for a, ahem… “Personal Coach”, I think I’ll look elsewhere.

vacation / harley party

August 2, 2005

Got back on Saturday from a week in Alexandria. I love it up there. We got sandwiched between a couple of hot, vacation-worthy in-the-water-all-day weeks with a cool and supremely windy week. We made the best of it. Lots of boating. Being on the chain of lakes made it possible, if not a bit perilous getting there. There always seemed to be whitecaps breaking right at the end of the boat lift, so getting out and turning into the wind needed to be done quickly. The old boat ran great — lots of fun.The youngest decided that his normal 7:15ish wake-up time wasn’t nearly early enough and cracked 6AM once and 6:30 twice. Wouldn’t have sucked that badly if there wasn’t an old couple staying downstairs. Anyway, as we always do, we drove around looking at cabins and lakehomes drooling. I could live up there — so could Ang and the boys. They love the water.

On Saturday evening, after we finished unpacking the Harley’s started rolling in at the neighbor’s house. The newly-widowed lady has a new beau. He turned 58 on Saturday and they had a party. Wouldn’t have been too bad, except for the big(or is it small)-dick-swinging noise competition. Those damn bikes are loud. I hate them. The noise and language caused us to spend the rest of the afternoon indoors, but I did get to see a couple of tramps give the birthday boy a double shirts up salute which he enjoyed with his face. Nice.

“We won’t be here too long”, was the explanation from the son, but at 1AM, things were still going with lots of yelling and a subtle cloud of the chronic wafting through the back yard. At 6AM, the jackasses were leaving. Did I mention the noisy bikes? This had better be an isolated incident.

My cartoon bubble of the goings on late night into early morning has a gaggle of limbs, heads and asses in varying degrees of undress in a wriggling pile on the floor…shudder. Her ‘ol doctor husband would be mighty mighty proud I’m sure.