It’s been five years and it still affects me when I think about it. Field was just a year-and-a-half at the time and I was out of work. He got up at about 8AM and I took him down the hall to watch Teletubbies while I took a shower. What I saw next was unfathomable. It was bad enough to hear the newscasters talking about reports of a “small plane” hitting the tower when even I, from 1200 miles away, could see that this was a B-I-G hole, but to see the debris and the “stuff” falling from the tower was hard to deal with. Tears came.
I called my wife (already at work) with the news and as I relayed the information, that dark airplane from behind streaked in. It was the strangest sensation when it slammed into the building. I screamed “another one hit the other tower!” Ang was yelling “Shut up!” For the briefest moment I doubted what I had seen and considered it might be video of the first plane again — but both towers were now in trouble.
One of the doctor’s that Ang worked for called in that his son (Gordon Aamoth) was in the second tower (if memory serves). He was told to stay put and was clearly above the fire of the second plane. He didn’t make it out.
I couldn’t turn away and still have issues being away from the news for too long (thanks — I think — to MSN Direct, this is rarely the case).
I recall the relative quiet of the skies and the unusual fleet of grounded airliners sitting on the tarmac at MSP.
I recall the zig-zagging fighter jets those first couple days.
I recall a deep all-encompassing dread.
I recall very little sleep and an inability to get much of anything done.
It changed me. I suffered an infinitesimal amount compared to many, but its affects have lingered. I still wake each morning wondering what might have happened while I slept or what may happen during the day. I’m not crippled by it, but it does take up cycles that would be better directed toward positive pursuits. I’ve almost entirely forgotten how to relax.
This morning as I listened to the radio, the cut-ins and cut-aways were recordings from 5 years ago of people on the streets of New York being interviewed in the midst of it all. It was extremely powerful and brought back those tears. Tears I can only assume will always be in reserve when I think about that morning.